In some kind of limbo.

I was online with my really close buds from college, and we were talking about random things, past the hi how are u, and ended up discussing about how we are shaped with some choices we made in the past. and finally realizing that we all go back to our conversation at isis cafe many many many nights ago..

Like, if you are gay, single mommie, or single single and you find yourself in between this and that, lodged and stuck in a moment where specifications are not created, how do we stop the clock from ticking? more importantly, which buttons are we gonna push to make all IT happen? Stuck in some sort of limbo, yet still in control of how things will play out, the next few chapters that are gonna be added may involve another isis meet up. and a range of colors splashed in the most unlikely places.

Late bloomers. That's what we always call ourselves. Slow streak during the first year. And a crazy roller coaster ride on the last. And what do we do? Pray that God will make it happen NOW. Yet have you ever wondered about reaching for that one dream? that one wish? and when finally it's facing you, you realize, you don't really long for it anymore? Like an enlightenment of some sort? And have you ever had that feeling that you don't wish for anything more than this? That too many realizations have finally dawned, that you couldn't even make up a decent wishlist.

And so, we come to conclude, that as much as we wanted a picket fence kinda life. And that freshly baked pie smell. It's only gonna happen if fate allows it to happen. IF we allow it to happen. And somewhere along those lines, we all realized that there are a lot more than to that yearning. And I for one, have finally understood that life became full when i knew my worth. And my purpose. And the dreams etched in my brain is this, me living it half-fully. half making it there. IN other words, almost and close :)

Rafa asked: Where can gays stand when they reach their 30s? And I ask back. How will single mommies do when we reach the 30s?? Van told me, there is no tomorrow for her. BUT as we all started to say good nights, we all knew how the music will play out. And yes, it's still back to the isis coffee table. Coffee and Beer don't go together!
But a lot of the stories will hold the vodka in.

Oh well, Figure it out! We have a lifetime to do it. And I have the whole night to wish this effin colds away.

Gudnyt world :) Tomorrow is another one of those coffe.beer day.