Just in time for breakfast.

i'm flying to Cebu next weekend, for the annual business planning. And for the longest weeks, I couldn't even get myself to be a bit excited about it. I'm a little worried cuz I wouldn't be able to bring my lil one with me, though I'd be leaving her with good company here. I'm worried that she wouldn't be okay cuz I wouldn't be there to constantly check on her for two days. I'm worried that she might eat something that's bawal. I'm worried that she couldn't sleep at night cuz I couldn't sing her rock a bye baby. I'm worried that she'd be playing too much she'd get asthma attacks. I'm worried she might have tantrums. I'm worried that she'll miss me. Or that she wouldn't understand why I wouldn't come home after a day's work. I'm worried about me. cuz i know i'd be missing her sorely!

And I wonder if I'd be able to sleep at night when she's not beside me. Or when I couldn't sing her rock a bye until she falls asleep. And I wonder if she'll be able to eat her dinner or breakfast if i'm not there to make sandwhiches or even try cooking her favorite meals. And I wonder if she'd ever take a bath or go to the restroom by herself or would she allow the yayas to take her poops with duckie. I'm worried sick about missing her that I think I'd cry my eyes out the moment the plane leaves and land in Cebu. I know it. I just do. Cuz thinking about these now, I already miss her.

Coco is the love of my life. the center of my universe. the joy i keep in my heart. I don't know if she knows it. But she is seriously, really my life. And as cheezy as it may sound, i would be seriously lost without her.

I started telling her about the trip months and months ago so she'd be able to understand that I'd be leaving for a few days for work. And she knows where I'm going, cuz she's been there. And everytime i remind her that I'd be going to ride the plane, she always makes these sad puppy eyes and pout and says: byaan ko nimu? Breaks my heart over and over. And I say my lines over and over: No. Mommy needs to work in Cebu for two days only. And she smiles when she hears the word pasalubong. And goes on to say her wish list. I promise i'll search the whole of Ayala for that neat doctor stuff and dora dvd. She already got the mike :)

Then my good friend Van pops into my screen and tells me she'd be in Cebu the same week. And for old times' coffee and food and talk and laughter and tears, I suddenly become excited to fly to Cebu. (And makes me rethink of bringing Coco along). And i tell myself, the two day stint will fly fast. After a few rounds of kwentos and tears (for sure), I'll be flying in really early sunday morning to come home to Coco, just in time for breakfast.