For the first time in sooo many years, I don't dread Vday anymore. lol. I figured, I have always placed my personal happiness on the hands of some other person. Always have had expectations of one kind and found myself being disappointed one event after another. Always have been dependent on the existence of some significant other. Always had. But recently, I realized that I can live for myself and by myself. And I have stopped having expectations simply because I feel at peace with being alone. I guess this is cuz I have found the unconditional love that I have been searching year in and year out. I found it in motherhood; I found it in my little girl's tight hugs. And this time around, I feel it is enough.
It's not true that man live alone. If my memory serves me right, Rousseau thought that we are social beings and that we live by being with other people. We thrive because of other people's existence. But I know that we do not exist because of others. We live because of ourselves alone. But we live for others too.
It is the paradox of man. We strive to live on our own, by ourselves, for ourselves yet we constantly come home to someone, or to a group of people we would like to call family. Because we only feel complete when someone very special comes to share everything with us.
But for now, we make do with baking cupcakes and scattering bouquets of yellow roses around the house. Sigh. It's a lovely sight, with the sunshine shining through, hearts day is actually pretty.
Happy Hearts Day everyone, we single parents also have a space on this couples only day. LOL.
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