Deleting Unwanted Vibes.

I had the longest afternoon naps in the past months. I woke up with my lil one shaking my shoulders and proclaiming she needed to go to the restroom. Hearing her hushed voice still brings a smile to my face.

I've been really tired this week. I'm always tired when my boss is in town. Maybe cuz he always manages to squeeze in a lot more extra work than needed and would require us to haul ass twice more than usual. I'm also tired of dealing with the B**** in our team, I'm tired of hating her this much and wanting to wring her neck so. I'm tired of her childish attitude and her equally immature partner. I'm tired of taking in negative vibes from both of them. AND i'm seriously tired of having to put up with their unacceptable behavior.

I told myself that this has got to stop. I mean, it could only affect if I would let it right? I don't know what is the DEAL with her, but every time that I find a little thing worthy of being happy about, she just finds some needle to blow everything up.

But Enough already. I owe it to myself to be free from this excess baggage. She isn't even worthy of this space in my blog. She definitely does not deserve a place in my world.

AND So,

I promise myself to not say anything about her (of course, they're all bad LOL).
I promise not to bitch.
I promise not to mind her.
I promise to let her bitchiness roll down my shoulders.
I promise to stay in my personal space.
I promise to block her from my view, my work, my life.
I promise to take deep breaths and count one to ten when I feel like punching them both.
I promise to let ugly sidekick be, and to not make her feel like she does look like Petrang Kabayo whenever I could. Afterall, it really isn't her fault she was born ugly.

I will let these mundane things go, let every small thing and day pass, and I will keep my promises simply because I want to delete her from my world. and I want to be untired.

And I must remember, that the last person who has made me feel THIS tired and this fed up isn't actually lounging on her laurels. Must say, karma comes and when it does, it bites you in the ass. So, go on, bitch on for all I care. You definetely won't be having the last laugh.

Embrace only the beautiful, accept only the Happy. -- This weekend's reaffirmation.
RADIATE only LOVE. And attract only Love. sigh :D

BTW, my framed pictures look absolutely great!- happy thought :D I love LOVE!! yeee!

Wake Me Up in 5 Hours.

This morning, I hopped into my cab, carrying my dance outfit, notebook and a lot of research material, with hair barely combed, flying another kiss to my little one and managing to say a small prayer of thanks to our God and I asked myself if all my mornings will be always be like this.

And I answered by ending my day just like the other nights.

I'm super tired. My eyes already sting and my joints ache like crazy. But i still couldn't sleep. Cuz I have like, a dozen articles, the first three chapters of a thesis, and tons of reports needed for the business planning due by Friday and weekend. I am really, absolutely tired. And almost in a panic. I don't really know how I could all finish them, all I know is just that I really have to. And I really badly want to.

Have you ever wished a day would consist more than 24 hours? and a week more than 7? Have you ever wondered if our bodies would constantly run on adrenaline and would only require rest for a maximum of two hours? Have you ever wondered what things you could do or places you could see then? Have you ever wondered if playing with your little girl a few hours a week, read her stories a few minutes each night, sing her lullabies a few moments every single day would ever be enough?

Have you ever thought about just sitting down with a cup of coffee, watching the sun rise and thinking about how lovely the morning is? I know I badly need to sleep. My bed feels empty for a really long time already. But I'm too worried I might over sleep and miss the deadline I set for myself. And I think i'm constantly hopping on from one thing to another I almost forget that I also need to stop for a moment and watch the lil green tea I planted has grown into a shrub. I need to seriously take a rest.

Coco has no more fever, and has already fallen asleep when I got home. BUT She woke up to greet me hello and I asked her how her day went. And she regaled me with stories and a yawn. My lil gurl is slowly growing before my very eyes. And with all the worrying that I do, and all the work that I try to finish, I ask myself, what if one day I'll be already bringing her to pre-school? Now I don't want the days to fly super fast anymore.

She said: Let's go to sleep na mom, and went on to say goodnight to her anak and dora. Before closing her eyes, and kissing me goodnight, she tells me in a matter of fact way, kantahi ko ma. And i did. Rock a bye Baby, lalala... I hope this will rock me to sleep as well.

Good night world. Wake me up in 5 hours please.